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 Things you should know ....

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Ian
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Ian

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Number of posts : 1764
Age : 52
Location : Wales
Registration date : 2008-11-25

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PostSubject: Things you should know ....   Things you should know .... I_icon_minitimeMon 21 Sep 2009, 11:01 am

Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop. 
 


Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink. 
 


For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.

Remember to use a timer. 


A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you'll be afraid to cough. 



If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

You only need two tools in life: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 
 


Finally, always remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

_________________
Release the Kraken .....
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Jo Mc-M
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Jo Mc-M

Female
Number of posts : 120
Age : 39
Location : Denbighshire
Registration date : 2008-11-24

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PostSubject: Re: Things you should know ....   Things you should know .... I_icon_minitimeTue 22 Sep 2009, 3:26 am

Ian wrote:
You only need two tools in life: WD-40 and Duct Tape...
or if you're Murf, DW-40 from Lidl/Aldi... Laughing
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