This Forum is no longer in use - please visit for the new system.
HomeCalendarGalleryFAQSearchRegisterLog in

Share | 

 Things you should know ....

Go down 
UCET Member

Number of posts : 1764
Age : 52
Location : Wales
Registration date : 2008-11-25

PostSubject: Things you should know ....   Mon 21 Sep 2009, 11:01 am

Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop. 

Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink. 

For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins.

Remember to use a timer. 

A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you'll be afraid to cough. 

If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

You only need two tools in life: WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 

Finally, always remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

Release the Kraken .....
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Jo Mc-M
Registered User

Number of posts : 120
Age : 39
Location : Denbighshire
Registration date : 2008-11-24

PostSubject: Re: Things you should know ....   Tue 22 Sep 2009, 3:26 am

Ian wrote:
You only need two tools in life: WD-40 and Duct Tape...
or if you're Murf, DW-40 from Lidl/Aldi... Laughing
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Things you should know ....
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
» Toys and things, Hobby shop expansion into selling metal detectors and supplies
» awesome things to make out of bacon
» New offerings from Toys and Things Wollongong Australia
» The Funniest Things Non-Runners Say
» Clarification of WA miners right

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
United Cavers Exploration Team :: Humour & Jokes :: Written-
Jump to: